What Can Children Learn Through Imitation?
What will they imitate?
They imitate our words, our tone of voice, even our facial expressions. It can be frustrating when they copy the things we wish they wouldn’t, but they’ll imitate the good too. Just as they imitate kindness, they’ll imitate other simple and good habits.
Case File: Parenting Ideas
Your Parenting Secret Mission:
Let the kids see you doing something you hope they will imitate.
Children are amazing imitators – the difficulty is that they are not always the best interpreters of what they see, so sometimes we need to slow down and consider what model we are giving them.
For instance, I use digital media all the time – I write on a keyboard, and I adore the fact that my library offers digital books to check out – now that I can read on a phone screen that will light up I am back to reading lots and lots and LOTS again.
The thing is, my kids don’t always realize that I’m doing something like reading a book or writing an article – it all looks the same. Mama is sitting at a computer or with a phone. I make a point to talk about what I do, but even more powerful than talking is what they see that they can imitate – like letting them see me write in a notebook or read a physical book.
Here are some things children can learn through imitation:
- Reading a book
- Writing a journal, a letter or a thank you note
- Doing a craft you love. (It’s not always easy with kids around, but do they see you taking care of yourself and nurturing your interests?)
- Playing an instrument, or listening to music you love.
- Carefully putting away an item you want to keep safe
- Taking a walk
- Taking time to stop and admire beauty – point it out
- Pausing to be grateful before you eat
- Trying new foods
- Talking with your elders – listening to grandparents or “adopted” grandparents with respect and interest
- Managing your frustration calmly when you can’t find something
- Putting you dish right into the dishwasher
- Offering a guest a glass of water or other refreshment
- Talking about your family in a positive way
- Talking about your business or work in a positive way
- Being polite to cashiers, clerks and other service staff
- Finding the “silver lining” in annoying situations
- Pushing in your chair
- Laughing about getting rained on, splashed on or other slight mishaps
- Smiling often – this habit is inspired by the grin inducing chapter on “Mouth Yoga” in the book Momfulness (Amazon affiliate link) by Denise Roy. I appreciate her reminder that the simple act of smiling can make the difference between feeling stressed and feeling grateful. Now that’s something I want my kids to imitate.
What simple habit would you add to the list?
Today, consider a habit you’d love to see your kids pick up and let them see you do it.
Parenting Secret Missions are quick ideas for connecting with your kids, trying out a new parenting idea, finding gratitude amidst chaos, sparking conversation and finally, inspiring fun! Don’t take them too seriously, read them with a spirit of adventure or experimenting and keep the mission in mind for the day if it strikes you.
64 Positive Things to Say to Kids
Subscribe to Download your FREE printable of 64 Positive Things to Say to Kids
Yes, I agree and share that kind of joy! In our neighborhood, we also call attention to big and small events, creatures, new things growing and so forth . We also knock on our neighbor’s door when we sight a rainbow. It is fun and all the children seem to love gathering with others to enjoy! One night, while looking down the river, we saw the Northern lights! It was delightful to share this experience with families who are our neighbors!
….too bad that in America and with a full time working Dad we HAD to adopt these tactics over time to survive……
I buy nothing new (except toothbrushes, underwear, sheets,)and we treasure hunt(ed) @ thrift stores—–they ALL LOVED the adventure.
They’re now-17-20-35 year olds and now they hunt on their own….
Love this
Find that one person in the room who feels sad or insecure and make them feel loved and accepted.
Thank you Traleigh! I love hearing that and being reminded of it in clear language is a boost, for me, to be more aware and to do this as often as I can!!! Thanks.
Vicki B Bondi – self care is a great one – and a work in progress for me too!
apologise. My kids were stunned when I apologised recently. I said that just because I’m a mum docent mean I never make mistakes.
Read a book
Being kind to others .
My mom always made a big pot of chicken soup (Italian version) whenever she heard that someone was sick in bed. I can remember so many, many times delivering soup to friends of ours or acquaintances and neighbors. My grandmother did the same thing as a mother many years earlier in New York. I do the same and I hope that my children will keep the tradition going.
Yes, Lucia this is a wonderful way to really bring kindness, thoughtfulness, generosity into the family, neighborhood, community. And hearing how your parents set an example and you felt involved in the gesture
must have strengthed your ideal and carry it on yourself today! I so admire that!
I love #10, and my kids are getting the hang of it. The Big Bang Theory helps us with #13. 🙂
I would add:
Lose gracefully
Give up your anger, and say so. Whether it’s the latest election, the neighbor, the mechanic, your spouse. Feel it and let it go. That’s always been a hard one for me, esp if someone hurt my feelings.
I love this! xx A
I love hearing from you Angela, thank you.
Thank a veteran for his service! They are often wearing a hat or shirt that identifies them. If you see someone, stop them and thank them with a handshake.
Love that, thanks Jennifer.
That is a lovely gesture to thank those people who really take on serving their country, their communities and so forth!Visiting a fire station can be an exciting thing and for the children to witness our thankfulness and respect for thepeople who do these amazing things! Thanking your doctor, waiter, librian…etc. helps create a culture of gratitude.
Aw, Michelle Cravens, love that!
Reading through this list, I’m aware of how many of these I observed my parents doing while I was growing up. They set a great example for me to follow and I find joy in being able to set an example for my own child.
I too remember that my parents modeled, I believe the entire list above, and it is such an amazing thing for me to see those same values and attitudes in my grandchildren now!!!
Claire Hafer Spampinato – I really love the simplicity of sharing your food and sharing hugs
Ooh, that’s a good one and a life long lesson. Claire Hafer Spampinato
Sweet 🙂
Sharing my food. Sharing hugs. Being kind to grumpy people. Being kind and respectful to homeless people: making eye contact, greeting them, maybe even offering a hug. Trying new things. Seeing the adventure in a situation instead of fear or disappointment.
Not blaming but instead finding solutions to the problem. “Making it right”
Lol
I love seeing my daughter complimenting people & smiling & saying hello! Being polite & friendly is one trait I love about her!!
Ha, that makes sense yes. Unless it’s a habit you actually want to have…This is getting circular…Stephanie James
Yes but don’t start a new habit because it’s a quality you want them to have…
If that makes sense?
I love it when I’m inside and my kids run in from out back to grab me so I don’t miss a rainbow, a beautiful cloud, that kind of thing – makes me feel good that they know I want to pause and enjoy with them.
Those are such precious and joyful times! Being with my children during those wonderful times is my favorite time.
Perfect! I love noticing and commenting on nature’s beauty, and I’m reminded when my children point out a colorful sunset. ??Children absolutely mirror our habits, our joys…
MEET A CHALLENGE WITH A SMILE ! I recall an moment , a long time ago. Some children in my care, including my young daughter, were playing with some blocks, piling them up quite high! One child was very disturbed, upset, crying, when his stack fell over. Oh, so, I remember changing the situation up by smiling and bringing joy and enthusiasm to the idea that now, it can be built up again, also bringing humor and lightness when they toppled over again. That attitude was one I wanted my daughter to imitate. And she does, and her children do too! It makes me smile to see!